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Single Comedy Songs By Garry Desmond

On this page you will find all my comedy songs as single tracks. You can download just the songs you like to make your own playlist or burn them to a CD.

They are not in any particular order so just have a browse through them. Simply add the tracks to the shopping cart and check out when you are done. Immediately after payment you will be given access to your downloads.

Please note that in order to prevent link sharing all download links will expire after 72 hours so please download your songs immediately after payment.

Remoaners Song

I don't normally to political comedy but I could not resist this one. A little ELO re-write taking the mickey out of the EU remoaners and remaniacs.

You can get Brexit posters here

Or Join the Brexit Party here.

Sample of the Remoaners Song

Babba Medley (The)

You will recognise all the tunes as being the big hits from the group ABBA. This however is the BABBA medley. A medley of songs that highlight the downfalls of eating that hot curry the night before.

Sample of the Babba Medley

Ebay Song UK Version

A little story to tell you what happened when my wife got addicted to shopping on Ebay and nearly sent us bankrupt. Not to be confused with the other American Ebay song by Weird Al Yankovic.

Sample of The Ebay Song UK

Bumberful Tonight

My parody of the Eric Clapton classic Wonderful Tonight. This one is the working man's version about the wife (who of course we love very much) with a great big bum.

Sample of the Bumberful Tonight

Is It A Boy Or A Girl?

A funny little song warning about the pitfalls of trying to hook up with what look like some very lovely looking local girls when holidaying abroad. Have a listen and don't get caught out.

Sample of Is It A Boy Or A Girl?

Dear Penis

My version of a very funny song by an American comedian. This song is about a conversation between a middle aged man and his willy. A funny little ditty with a country feel.

Sample of Dear Penis


My version of the classic Tammy Wynette song however mine is a little more accurate to the title and is about a REAL divorce. There is some swearing but it is all spelled out.

Sample of Divorce

Divorce (Country Re-mix)

This is the same song as above but with a more authentic country feel to the backing track and my poor South American accent.

Sample of Divorce (country re-mix)

The Bingo Song

This one was actually written to amuse my fellow entertainers but was surprisingly well received by large numbers of the club audiences who get fed up with the bingo crowd.

Sample of the Bingo Song

I'm In The Mood For Wanking

A very rude parody of the Nolans song I'm in the mood for dancing. This one is all about that male pass time that is rarely talked about. Warning ADULT song not family friendly.

Sample of I'm In The Mood

I Swear

Let us be clear here, my version of this song IS about swearing. It does bug me when a song has a title that is misleading. I just HAD to correct that and make it more accurate.

Sample of I Swear

It Was Over

For those of you that remember my old man character Earnie Grumpalot this was his song about his first date. Full of the trials, tribulations and male accidents you may remember. This is an ADULT song.

Sample of It was Over

I've Farted

Not too much to say about this song apart from it does what it says on the can. A quick study in song into the complicated world of farting. Some say it is an art you know?

Sample of I've Farted

Jen Tyler

A parody of the Tom Jones classic Delilah. However this version is all about a blonde nymphomaniac called Jen Tyler. This song is not based on any living person you have my word on that!

Sample of Jen Tyler

Quazzy's Song

A cheeky little ditty based around that lovable famous character Quazzy Modo. Not sure this was ever performed live but I wrote some time ago in Gran Canaria.

Sample of Quazzy's Song

Santa Claus Was Going To Town

My version of a nice rude Christmas song originally performed by Kevin Wilson. An adult take on an old Christmas classic and a great little giggle for Xmas.

Sample of Santa Claus Song

Shagging Holiday

A song I wrote for 18-30's. A parody of Cliff Richards song summer holiday the difference being my version discusses what REALLY goes on on holidays.

Sample of Shagging Holiday

Songs Sung Blue

A parody of the Neil Diamond classing songs sung blue. When I heard his version I thought "What's blue about that?" All I can say is that has been remedied.

Sample of Songs Sung Blue

The Timeshare Song

A silly little song that has a poke at the timeshare reps that used to annoy the hell out of British tourists in Gran Canaria. Very daft but it always went down well.

Sample of The Timeshare Song

More comedy songs will be coming soon!

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